Rhythm & Balance And The Calling of God

Rhythm and balance is what I'm searching for. Each day, I try to make sure I connect on many different levels, for instance:

1. Spiritual-I'm currently trying (not always succeeding) to read 15 chapters of the Bible on a daily basis.

Awareness-I want to always be in conversation with God. This is very important to me and I'm hoping that I can make this a lifetime habit.

2. Physical-I've been going to the gym 4-5 times per week and eating a healthy diet. I feel good, no...I do not have a six pack yet, but my energy level is high and I feel like I'm making an effort to do the right thing. Also, today, instead of listening to music or watching the news, I brought the iPod and listened to an Erwin Mcmanus talk. Great combination.

3. Family-I'm actually spending a lot more time at home because we are not working in the office anymore...From 5:30PM to 8:00PM I try my best to be with my family...Not only in close proximity, but I want to be present and active...Helping with homework, playing hide & seek, reading books and playing games etc. (which Bailey has to win or else she is VERY upset)


4. Work-I love what I do, Real Estate is great. Yes, It's hard...But if work is not hard, then why do it? So, I'm trying to be very productive & maximize my time.

However, there is one thing missing...And that is ministry...I'm trying to be patient and wait for God to unfold his purpose, but my personality is not one to sit around and twiddle my thumbs...I'm a dreamer, doer and I want to do something great for God and beneficial for the global church. I do not want Real Estate to be the totality of my life.

So, this thought has me pondering why it is so difficult to wait. Most folks that I know are content with their lives, and jobs. Sure, they get tired of the grind...But, I feel like I'm tortured to do something more then the normal. Not because I feel better, or more gifted or spiritual then other folks...So, I'M pondering the "why" questions...Of course scripture always speaks. So this morning I was mediating and here are some scriptures that came to my mind via the voice of God:

For preaching the Good News is not something I can boast about. I am compelled by God to do it. How terrible for me if I didn't do it! 1st Cor 16:9

And I can't stop! If I say I'll never mention the LORD or speak in his name, his word burns in my heart like a fire. It's like a fire in my bones! I am weary of holding it in! Jeremiah 20:9

Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.
Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love.
Always keep yourselves united in the Holy Spirit, and bind yourselves together with peace.
We are all one body, we have the same Spirit, and we have all been called to the same glorious future.
There is only one Lord, one faith, one baptism,
and there is only one God and Father, who is over us all and in us all and living through us all.
However, he has given each one of us a special gift according to the generosity of Christ.
That is why the Scriptures say, "When he ascended to the heights, he led a crowd of captives and gave gifts to his people."*
Notice that it says "he ascended." This means that Christ first came down to the lowly world in which we live.*
The same one who came down is the one who ascended higher than all the heavens, so that his rule might fill the entire universe.
He is the one who gave these gifts to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers.
Their responsibility is to equip God's people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ, until we come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God's Son that we will be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ. Eph 4:1-13

If we are Christ followers, we are all part of the church, we are all called to minister to the body and to live missional lives for the sake of the worl. But, some of us are called to a specific role...It's be no means better, or greater, but the reality that I must deal with is simple...I will not live a life of rhythm and balance until I feel like I'm doing what God has called me to do. And that is to tell the story of Jesus Christ, His death and resurrection, his love and grace, his power and authority...And that is what drives me, that is what keeps me up at night. Here is why:

When I was 18, I had a good friend that was killed in a drive-by shooting. I was VERY fundamental in my Christian beliefs back then, and I was tortured by the thought of him burning in hell. I could see his face and hear his voice. It's been close to 15 years and this still effects me. I heard Erwin say this today, those who grew up closest to God, like in a church or even in the West, are those who SOMETIMES struggle with searching for God...Because they do not understand what it's like to not know God, or to be without God. For me, I never heard the gospel till I was 16. Yes, you heard that right. I grew up in the states and I never heard the gospel. Anyhow, I think those who did grow up with God, have a hard challenge to keep that passion for God. A friend of mine said he struggled with Christianity for so long, then he saw the Passion OF The Christ movie and he realized that every time he read the Bible, he thought of it like a cartoon, it was hard for him to grasp the "adult" way of thinking as to the Sunday School lessons that filled his mind. WOW! As for me, I know how it feels like to wonder when you die; where will you go??? Is their something "bigger" out there? Anyhow, this is what drives me to share the Jesus story. And I think I'm stuck with a life long passion :) Peace & Love!